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Absolute Healing Blog

Support for you as you separate or divorce

Posted in Divorce and Separation on 10/04/2013

Support for you as you separate or divorce

You may not have chosen to leave a relationship, but you can choose to go forwards with compassion,( not least for yourself) , inner strength and a determination to live according to your own deepest values.

Separation and divorce bring many challenges. It is common to go through periods of intense grief, anger, fear and overwhelm and this is all part of the natural process of transition from an ending to a new beginning. A regular mindful practice will keep you in touch with your own inner wisdom and strength and this will give you direction and support even when your mind is in turmoil.

You may at times notice that you are stuck in a cycle of hurtful thoughts. The thinking mind has a habit of dwelling on past unpleasant experiences which keep you trapped in a loop of pain. A mindfulness guide can help you to break the pattern and bring your awareness to the here and now. This shift brings about feelings of relief, peace and well-being and you will find that you have more enthusiasm for life.

When you go through a relationship break-up you may find yourself supporting others. Parents and in-laws may find it hard to come to terms with what has happened and they may offer strong opinions about what you should do. Your children may need help in accepting the change and your friends may be shocked and angry on your behalf. This is a lot to cope with alone when you are also handling your own feelings. It is good to talk to someone who is not directly involved to help you sort out what is best for you and how you can support your loved ones, and a mindful practice will keep you clear about your own values, guiding you to respond to others with patience and compassion.

If you have been a passive or dominated partner for some time you may have forgotten how to live independently. You self-confidence may be low and you may feel unworthy of help or even of a fair share of the assets you have acquired in your time as a couple. A mindfulness guide will help you to see your situation more objectively, acting as a mirror so that you can see that a lot of your beliefs about yourself are simply untrue.

You may have focussed your energy on bringing up children, providing for the family and balancing work and home life for many years. The prospect of life as a single person may be unwanted and can seem overwhelming: you may feel that you do not have the will or the tools to start afresh. Your own thinking mind can be your harshest critic and can also be your own worst enemy. A mindfulness practice will keep you on touch with your inner strength and wisdom, helping you to recognise your own potential as you take the first steps towards building a new life.

Working through a life transition mindfully is a huge opportunity to learn about yourself and discover an inner strength and wisdom that will support you for the rest of your life.

Call me or email me now to get started.